Saturday, June 30, 2012

first meeting with the e-mom

To say we were nervous about this meeting is an understatement. The night before, I texted T to make sure the time we were supposed to pick her up was still okay. I never got a response. The worrier in me went to the extreme, of course. Maybe she changed her mind. Maybe she's back in the hospital. Let me tell you something: the waiting after you get matched is five MILLION times worse than it is before you get matched. It's a nightmare. During the week when I'm at work, it's great because I'm busy and I don't have time to think about what's happening. But at night is when I have a hard time not worrying about T and the baby.

So, yesterday morning, I did the next logical thing: I called her. She sounded awful, and I asked her a couple of times if she wanted to reschedule for when she felt better. But she insisted on having us come out. As we got on the highway, the attorney called, and he gave us a little more insight on why she wasn't responsive the day before. I don't want to go into detail to respect her privacy, but he reassured us that everything was fine and that she was looking forward to seeing us.

One thing I love about T is that she's incredibly honest. She told us exactly what happened, even in more detail than she told the attorney, as soon as she got into the car. There's complete transparency there, which reassures us that this will continue to go smoothly.

Lunch was great. I had already spoken with her several times on the phone, so the conversation was easy. There was never once an awkward lull. We let her pick the restaurant for lunch, and she told everyone who asked about her pregnancy that this was our baby. We shared the name we picked out, photos of the nursery, and we took a picture of the pile of baby gifts we'd already received this week. She was so happy to see how LOVED this baby already is. We also brought along a couple of gifts for her younger daughter. Despite her situation, T has such a positive attitude about this. I lost count at how many times she told us how excited she was for us to become first-time parents. It was also crazy to hear how much we all have in common - from our hatred of math and our love for seafood to our favorite colors. Even names and dates in our families match up: her daughter was born the day we got married and her middle name is the same as my mom's and the middle name we chose for the baby.

Our afternoon confirmed for us that she is serious about sticking to the plan. She even texted me this morning, thanking us again for lunch and saying how strongly she felt that she made the right decision by choosing us.

Now? We wait. Yesterday marked five weeks to her due date, but with the baby already weighing over 6 pounds and T's stress level relatively high, labor could happen at any time. We hope that the baby stays in as long as possible for health reasons, but we are also so anxious to meet her. We've waited over four years for this moment. It's hard to believe that it is almost here.

38 comments:

Shannon said...

I am so happy that it went well! I was nervous for you yesterday too, as I am sure many others were. It sounds like you were meant to find her, and more importantly, meant to find your little one. Congrats to you both!

Just the Tip said...

That is soooo awesome! Of course I'm curious about the situation (but that's kind of human nature right?)

I am beyond happy for you and this baby girl.

Anonymous said...

So glad everything went well :)

Arlyne said...

I'm so incredibly happy for all of you!!!! You deserve Nothing less than the perfect experience from beginning to end & your little girl is so loved by all of us who have followed you on your long journey! xoxo

Rach said...

My anxiety would be through the roof! I'm glad it went well. Hoping the remaining match is smooth and stress free!

Kelly said...

I know you've had to endure hell for the past few years but there's a reason; this was meant to be your baby!

Now stop blogging and go get ready for your little girl! :)

Anna said...

So awesome!!! I'm so very happy for you!!

PCOSChick said...

Words do not even describe how happy this post makes me!

Lindsay said...

That's so great everything is falling into place. Congratulations and best wishes on soon being able to welcome a baby girl into your family!

Elizabeth said...

Wow! LOVE the great connection you have with her! That little girl IS so loved already! =) I can't wait to hear the name you chose.

It Is What It Is said...

Congratulations on such a successful lunch and match!

Dawn said...

I am so happy you had a good meeting! I went into labor at 35w 5d and my boys had no NICU time.

Amanda said...

I am SO happy for you Katie!! I have been silently following your blog for a few years now, and was just waiting to hear this news! So happy to hear that you two have made such a good connection, she sounds like an amazing person.
I wouldn't worry TOO much about the possibility of the baby being born early at this point- of course every baby is different, but my twins were born at only 35 weeks, and did not even spend a second in the NICU, they were 100% fine :)

Katie said...

Thanks, Amanda! Unfortunately, it's not the prematurity we're worried about. She'll be born with a medical issue that may likely require a NICU stay.

Rebecca said...

What an awesome meeting!! I'm beyond excited for you!!

Hoping she stays in tight as long as possible!

Erica said...

Glad to hear that your lunch went so well! Cant wait to hear of your baby girl's arrival!!! Even thou I dont comment or let my presence be known I am silently rooting for you!!!

Erica

Stefanie Blakely said...

I am so happy that yesterday went well-- I'm sure this is all just surreal. This is happening! Your daughter will be here in less than 5 weeks! I can't wait for all of your dreams to come true. xoxo/.

Daryl said...

I'm so happy for you and glad it went well. The fact that you chose her middle name for your little girl seems like kismet!

Secret Sloper said...

So glad the meeting was wonderful. It was your first meeting with your daughter, too!! I am wishing you peace and calm these last few weeks.

Slackie O. said...

So excited for you all... so, so excited! Will continue to keep ALL of you in my thoughts.

Marianne said...

Oh how very very exciting!!!!!!! So happy for you!

Michelle said...

I'm so so happy for you!!!! I haven't commented before, but I was on the TTC boards with you on iVillage years ago, and have kept up with you here. I just had a baby girl 3 weeks ago, and I am thrilled for you to meet your baby girl in just a few weeks. I'll be waiting on pins and needles for updates. What a great visit!!

Rita said...

So happy and excited for you! You'll be a MOM in just a few weeks!!

Just the Tip said...

Katie- I know you probably can't speak on the medical issue but I have two special needs little ones. I prefer the term, "medically complex," So if you need any advice or direction I can possibly help. We have done more than our fair share of hospital stays/surgeries/procedures & dr's appointments! Argh.

Gurlee said...

So happy for you!

Wade's World said...

I am so excited and happy for you! :)

lparsons15 said...

Holy crap! I was so nervous for you guys too! I am so glad it went well and things seem to be on track!! I can't wait for you to meet your daughter!

unaffected said...

So, so happy for you!! Sounds like T is wonderful and solid in her choice. I can't wait for your baby to be born!!

missohkay said...

That is fantastic! I'm glad you feel good about it (albeit totally nervous)!

someday-soon said...

Sounds like it couldn't have gone ANY better =)

Lauren said...

I am so happy for you and your husband! So glad to find out that the meeting went well with T. I can't believe you'll be meeting your baby girl soon!

kristin said...

I'm.going to cry, tears of joy of course but still! I am so incredibly happy for you guys, words cannot express how much! So glad to hear it was a successful meeting and that everything is right on track. Nobody I know deserves this happiness as much as you guys do and I am just so happy!!

AnotherDreamer said...

I am so glad that things went well! Continuing the positive thoughts for all of you!

M said...

I'm so glad it went well!!

nobabyruth said...

I'm so happy for you! It sounds like the start of a really great relationship. I also think it's phenomenal that you guys live close enough to T to be able to meet for lunch!

Alex said...

So glad the meeting went well! I'm so happy for you!!!

Logical Libby said...

This is so awesome! And how great that you will get to know your little girl inside and out!

Logical Libby said...

How wonderful! How great your baby will soon be in your arms!