Remember how I wrote that I wasn't thinking much about the adoption wait? Well, then I realized that next week marks three months on the list. And, for the first time, I'm starting to get a little . . . anxious.
I feel bad writing that. Mostly because I know some people who, for one reason or another, have waited three years to bring home their child. I have several friends who are waiting now and who have been going through this longer than we have. It's almost like when you're infertile and someone joins your support group who has "only" been trying for 6 months or a year. I know I've been guilty of it - looking at them and thinking, Oh, ONLY one year.
Now, here I am, on the other side. We've been waiting (officially) for three months, and I'm already getting restless. It's beginning to feel like the eternal two week wait. Imagine waiting months for that positive pregnancy test instead of just a couple of weeks. Talk about torture.
I made a few minor changes to our profile today. I haven't touched it since we started except to add a handful of new photos, and I've still been trying not to look at it on weekly basis. Especially not with the counter there, staring me in the face at over 430 views. It brings up all sorts of questions. Like, what is she looking for? Or, what about our profile does she not like? Questions I know there are not direct answers to.
So the waiting and wondering continues. I just need to figure out a way to turn off that third "w" - worrying.