Friday, July 9, 2010

the king

I'll be the first to admit that I'm not a fan of Lebron James, for a number of reasons. I think "King" James is egocentric, as evidenced by his one-hour TV special to announce where he would play this fall. (Really? You need an entire hour to talk about your future in the NBA?) He hasn't won a title, yet is still considered the king. Of what, exactly, I'm not sure. And I'm a Magic fan, so his snub of the Magic players during the 2009 playoffs really got my blood boiling. Not to mention how completely fucked our priorities are as a country: where we'd rather pay a basketball star million of dollars a year, while our teachers, police officers, and firefighters make next to nothing to shape the future of our society and put their lives in danger for others. Or where Lebron's decision is top story on the evening news instead of one of the other ten dozen things in this country that need our attention

I digress.

Despite this, I did end up watching the special last night for the sake of my husband. (The things we do for love.) In a conversation with reporters following the announcement, ESPN showed a brief clip of James's jerseys burning in Cleveland. His response? "I have to do what makes me happy."

At that moment, I empathized with Lebron James.

Yes, he's selfish. Yes, they way he went about announcing his decision was classless. As one reporter here put it, no one goes on national television and breaks up with their wife. He should have done it quietly and privately, out of respect for the Cavs. But, in the same sense, I get it. This was probably not an easy decision for him. As he stated several times in interviews last night, it was never about the money. He could have easily stayed in Cleveland, made more money, and possibly never win a title. Instead, he chose to do what he felt was best for him and what he thought would get him to his ultimate goal: winning a championship.

In many ways, my journey with IF follows a similar path. I've spent so much time trying to have faith that what we were doing would lead us to our ultimate goal (having a baby), only to experience failure after failure. I've had more than one doctor promise that he could get me pregnant. I've been told, "things were perfect" . . . but they were only perfect on paper. And here I am: 27 cycles later and still wondering when it's ever going to be our turn. I've tried to make this work and doctors have tried to make it work for me. The fact is, a drastic changed must be made for us to have a baby. Right now, that drastic change is moving on to IVF. It will leave us with less money. It's a huge gamble. And not everyone is on board with our decision. But we needed to make the best decision for us--regardless of money, loyalty, or emotions.

Lebron tried. He stuck with it and gave it his all, but he alone cannot win a championship. And just like it takes a village to raise a child (or a team to win a trophy), it takes more than one person to make a child. In our case, it takes dozens. So, Lebron may not be the classiest sports star or the most humble, but I get where he's coming from: when you want something so badly and you've waited so long to get it, you'll pull out all of the stops to reach that goal. Because when Lebron is older and out of his prime, he doesn't want to look back and say he's "31 years old with bad knees and no ring."

Just like I don't want to look back and say, "I'm 41 years old with a bad uterus and no baby."


Kakunaa said...

He is soooo not the king, but doing what we have to do? get it. i had to beg parents for money today. my whole financial plan went out the window. i get that part of it COMPLETELY.

The Steffens said...

Do what you have to do to reach your goals. And when you have your precious baby, I say you buy yourself a championship ring :)

Josey said...

LOL...I can't believe how well you actually tied those two subjects together. My husband will get this analogy - thank you!

Kelly said...

I agree...I can't believe you were able to mesh these two subjects together so well!

At least the money raised from the 1 hour special went to the Boys and Girls Clubs of America. I guess.

Crossed Fingers said...

Look at you tie those two together! I agree with your POV on this - you do what you have to do to make you happy. And I would like to ask who doesn't agree with your situation? And who said their opinion counted? You go girly! :) Fingers crossed IVF is your key!

Secret Sloper said...

I so agree that our national priorities are desperately out of whack when thowing a g-d ball through a hoop is more valuable than teaching children, keeping fellow citizens safe, or being the President of the country!!

But I'm glad you're taking James' winning attitude into your quest for a child.

Glass Case of Emotion said...

Great job at combining the two topics!

Holly said...

I will always root for my home team! Woo Hoo! Go Magic!

Seriously though, this was a great analogy. I know the decision to move on to IVF can be an intimidating one. I was so scared to cross that bridge but now that I have, I know it was the right move and the one that will get me to my goal. I hope it does the same for you.

Sara said...

Wow, thank you for posting about this. I have to admit I watch quite a bit of Sports Center and he has been hogging most of the coverage. It has been driving me nuts. I have been quite intrigued by it though because I really thought he should leave in order to pursue his goal of winning a championship. Thank you for relating it to IF. I can definitely look past the "classless" act of how he announced his big move, but now I can empathize with why he did.

suchagoodegg said...

I'm going to channel this post if I have to bail on a wedding at the end of the month.

We watched the LJ stuff while making din last night and the whole thing was annoying. He has really messed up his image!

ifcrossroads said...

As an avid sports fan I was thoroughly annoyed with the incessant Lebron James coverage all week long. Until my husband broke it all down for me yesterday. I initially thought that all the hype was ridiculous but in retrospect, I somewhat admire the way he handled the whole situation. Lebron took advantage of the hype and turned it into a good thing for Boys & Girls club in raising $5 million. I personally think he's a good guy, based on what I've read. He was under no obligation to share his intent with Cleveland before he left - he was a free agent. Colin Cowherd said it best today in his show - he said that there are 2 sides in the Lebron war. The blue-collar people who feel that they got "screwed" by him leaving and then you have the white collar people who "get it" and understand that this was a business decision.
I might not be white collar, but I get Lebron - this was a business decision. He didn't OWE anyone anything! He doesn't OWE Cleveland any explination. He was drafted to Cleveland and it's not like they were giving him a chance to be something in the beginning of his career - he helped his team the best he could. And after the way the Cav's team owner acted post-press show, it's apparent he's a big asshole and Lebron most likely made the right decision. Bottom line, like you said, he wants to WIN games. Lebron is a hometown boy - hell, he's STILL dating his hometown girlfriend from High School ... I don't think it was an easy decision to leave home and leave Cleveland.

Same can be said when you are switching RE's or treatment plans. You want to win. You go against the grain because it feels right to YOU although it might not be the popular decision with your RE, friends, etc.

Geesh, this got long. You're right Katie, we have a lot in common. I wish we lived closer together :) we'd be good friends for sure!

S.I.F. said...

I am so not even kind of a sports person (the beautiful thing about not having a husband is I don't have to follow these things!) But I kind of dig it. You do have to do what you have to do, and that should be the only explanation anyone else needs.

And you will NOT be 41 years old with a bad uterus and no baby. I just don't believe that for a second.

Leslie said...

Your post is so well written!! I know it is a hard decision .... I really hope that IVF is successful for you!!

Baby bump bound said...

Standing ovation!!! I love the analogy! So well put.

I have been down this IVF road for awhile now and I can attest to wanting, needing to find the best "team" of Drs to help me achieve my goal.

I am going to share this analogy with my hubs... he will appreciate it -- total jock!