Here is what's going to happen. I am going to type this. I am going to hit "publish." And then, my plan will have worked. I will have jinxed AF into arriving. Because this is what happens. My period is missing, I speculate as to whether I'm pregnant, and (sometimes) I test. Then, as soon as I talk about it or POAS, the manipulative ho-bag arrives.
So, here it goes:
Today is April Fools' Day and today marks five days with no signs of AF's arrival. Remember I wanted her to arrive last weekend? Well she didn't. And if her plane doesn't land soon, it won't be this weekend either.
This could be for a number of reasons, the most logical of which has to do with the lap and the fact that I had my last period immediately following the surgery. My body is possible still trying to adjust to its improved "parts." It could also have to do with the BCPs I took before the surgery and how they messed up my cycle, hormone levels, etc. It could be my body's way of making up for my 20-day cycle last month. Maybe it's trying to even things out?
I don't know, but I refuse, REFUSE to test. I don't want to see a negative. And then have her highness show up on my doorstep immediately following. I will wait this out. I will publish this post, and my stupid, bitchy relative will obey my desire to have her start on Sunday morning. I will call my doctor on Monday, and get in for a CD3 visit on Tuesday.
Enough with the cruel April Fools' Day joke, you crazy aunt. It's time to get this show on the road.