Sunday, November 30, 2008

let it snow

Tonight will be the first snow of the year here in Nashville. I'm making Philly cheesesteaks in the crock pot. Perfect cold weather food. I put the tree up today and did a little bit of Christmas shopping. Now I'm parked in front of the T.V. in my pajamas, waiting to hear if our office will be closed tomorrow due to weather. Fingers crossed! It would be nice to work from home and get some stuff done around the house.

Charlie left yesterday. I think he had a good time and it was nice to have a visitor. As much as we like living here and having our independence, it's hard being so far from family and friends--especially around the holidays. Thankfully, my mom and brother will be here for Christmas. I'm looking forward to it.

Wednesday, November 26, 2008

happy turkey day!

I probably won't have a chance to post again until Saturday or Sunday, so I'll say Happy Thanksgiving now! Charlie is flying in this afternoon and I need to go home and get started on the apple pie and the stuffing. Lots to do. We did our last minute shopping trip last night and Joey was SO cranky. Hopefully he's in a better mood when Charlie gets here. We are going downtown tonight and I will be drinking since I'm not ovulating until next week. Woo hoo! :)

On a side note, Joey has now spent the last four Sundays with Joe Blanton and his wife. I guess they've been coming in to his store for the cooking classes. I'm so jealous of my husband. He meets the best people at work.

Monday, November 24, 2008

okay, i lied

I wasn't THAT excited about AF getting here, mostly because now she won't LEAVE. I'm usually spotting by now, but I'm still bleeding steadily. What a pain!

My mind is going in a million different directions today. I'm supposed to be working on minutes from this morning's meeting, and I can't focus. This isn't good. I only have a day and a half to get all this crap off my desk before Thanksgiving. Our friend Charlie will be in town from Wednesday to Saturday, so there's no way I'll get work done if I need to take it home over the holidays. Not with a house guest.

Sigh. Time to get motivated.

Sunday, November 23, 2008

i love lazy sundays

Joey works today, so I will be spending the day in my pajamas, parked in front of the television. I will not work on anything pertaining to my job. I might even read a book for FUN. Imagine that. My brain (and body) need time to reenergize for what I'm sure will be a crazy Thanksgiving week at work. I am so far behind on everything I need to do before the two-and-a-half days off, it's unbelievable. But I'm not thinking about that. . . . :)

Yesterday Joey and I went out and bought ovulation predictor kits to use this cycle, a recommendation from my doctor. We also bought flaxseed oil, which I've read is supposed to help with fertility issues. We tried to buy PreConceive, but couldn't find any. Joey said yesterday, "If we're in, then we're in all the way." I think both of us are willing to try anything to get pregnant naturally, at this point.

Speaking of my husband, tomorrow will be six months since we tied the knot. I can't believe it. It feels like a week ago when I said, "I do." The two best words I've ever spoken.

Thursday, November 20, 2008

woo hoo! :)

I don't think I've ever been so excited to say this: My period has finally arrived. Hooray! After 31 longggggggggg days, this cycle is over. It's time to move on. "Aunt Flow" has been a tease all week, toying with my emotions, making me think I'm pregnant. Now it's finally over and we are on cycle #7. If anything, it's just one cycle closer to my ultrasound, more blood work, and Joey's SA.

This is how I feel every cycle, but I really hope #7 is OURS. It would be really nice to tell our family at Christmas. What a great gift that would be!

Cycle #7 will bring on some new experiments. We are both going to start taking some extra vitamin supplements, on top of the vitamins we are already taking. My doctor also wants us to try ovulation predictor kits. And, I think we are going to try PreConceive. I've heard good things about it and PreSeed, so I figured, "Why not?" At this point, we have nothing left to lose but our sanity.

Tuesday, November 18, 2008

good-bye, cycle #6

Well, my temps dropped this morning and I'm spotting--signs of my period's impending arrival. So I'll say bye to cycle #6 and hello to what I hope will be lucky cycle #7.

Time to get ready for work.

Monday, November 17, 2008

frustrated

So, my period is officially late but I haven't gotten a positive home pregnancy test. Ugh. My back is killing me and my abdomen is so bloated, yet it doesn't feel like my period is on its way and I don't "feel" pregnant. Not that I know what being pregnant feels like, but still. I just want to know one way or the other.

I guess I will just keep testing until something (anything!) happens. Fun! Thank God for Dollar Store tests. . . .

Wednesday, November 12, 2008

welcome!

Wow, a blog. Let's hope I stick with this one. I had one in high school and college, then got rid of it. I tried to resurrect it during my wedding planning days, but that was a bust. Truthfully, when you're planning a wedding, you don't have as much time to write about it as you'd think.

Well, here I am. I thought I would start a blog after Joey and I got pregnant so people could read about our pregnancy adventures--since most of of our friends and family live so far away. And six months/cycles later, still no baby.


We've always known we wanted to have kids as soon as possible, so we began trying right after the wedding. We thought things would happen right away, but they didn't. Month 1 went by. Then 2. Then 3. Now we are at month 6, about to hit month 7 this weekend if my home pregnancy test reads right. Months 3 and 4 were the worst. In August, I'm pretty sure I had a chemical pregnancy. By September, I was completely depressed. Now, I'm simply level. I don't cry anymore when I get my period or get negatives on pregnancy tests. My goal now is to just take it as it comes. It doesn't mean I don't think about it, but I don't let it run my life anymore. Regardless, it's still there and it's still an obstacle we've yet to overcome.

Two weeks ago was my first doctor's appointment regarding my fertility with my general practitioner. I didn't go to my OB/GYN. I had only seen her once and I wasn't thrilled. She worked in a women's clinic (a.k.a. "baby factory") and she spent the majority of the time trying to convince me to get the HPV vaccine. Ummmm, hello? I'm married, therefore I don't have the risk of contracting an STD. Ugh. How annoying. Not to mention that she looked like she was my age. I don't want an old lady, but I certainly want someone with experience. But I digress.

My GP was fabulous. She didn't make me feel like an idiot for coming in during cycle #6. She sat and listened to my concerns and reviewed my blood work and previous medical records: no abnormal paps, no endo, no history of anything that would prevent me from being pregnant. She recommending I keep charting and also asked me to start using ovulation predictor kits, even though she said our "timing" looked great. Most importantly, she said she would not make me wait a year or year and a half to begin testing and/or refer me to an RE. She said if I'm not pregnant by the end of January, we'll get to work trying to solve whatever the issue is. She understands. It took her two and a half years to get pregnant with her first child, and no doctor would see her until 18 months. She said to me as I was leaving, "I don't want you to go through the same things I did to get help."

I feel really grateful right now to have her, my husband, and a few close friends on my side. There aren't many people we feel comfortable talking to about this, especially not family. Not only do we not want the criticism, but we don't want the pressure. It's been hard on both of us. We have a lot of fears. As I said before, we thought, "If we want a baby, we'll have one!" But it turns out things don't work that way.

I think I've written enough randomness for one night.